Water of the Woods is in a major revision process. Here's a sneak peak of the first chapter...

The moon’s face lay hidden behind a veil of clouds. Darkness rested on the mossy grounds surrounding the old mansion. It had been months since the old mansion had held visitors inside its brick walls. Until just one night ago. The ancient house and its harbored secrets were encroached upon by one small family and their dog. There was an eeriness tonight that quieted even the screech owl and his mate.

Penny Prendergrast, young at only sixteen years old, lay peacefully asleep in the second story bedroom of the mansion. This was only her second night to sleep in this ancient house her parents had rented. The entire house lay in a slumber of darkness. It was quiet, too quiet.

Penny woke with a jolt. It was that sound again and that chill that crept into her scalp. The blackness of night grew blacker until Penny could almost feel the darkness. This was also her second night to be awakened to the sound of movement on the other side of the wall. It was easy to excuse it the first time. An old house, new surroundings, it was easily dismissed. But now, she wasn’t so sure.

The clanking of metal sounded through the walls. How could she hear it so clearly? Penny lay frozen, waiting. A clank and then a shuffle. Penny jumped upright in her bed and snapped on the little lantern she kept on the bed stand. That sound was no longer on the other side of the wall but in her closet. She clutched at the lantern as though it was her only source of safety.

That sound again. Should she cry out? How had she not hear the intruder come through her room and enter her closet? The only way out was back through her room and out the door into the hallway. It was inevitable. The intruder would have to come back through her room to escape.

A thud, a snap, and then that jingling again. Penny jumped from bed, rushed for the door and swung it open. Slipping into the hallway she pulled the door tightly shut and breathed little gasps.

Her parents were just across the hallway in the next room. She could make a dash for it. Penny steeled herself. She was sixteen years old. She wasn’t going to wake up her parents because of a bump in the night.  Standing in the quiet hallway away from the noises bolstered more courage, until a dim yellow light shone from the far end of the hallway and out of sight. Penny’s eyes were glued to the end of the hallway. A creak and then another snap. Someone was down the hall in the library, which meant there were two intruders in the house.

Quote From My Uncle

"If you hear a voice within you say, 

'You cannot write,' 

then by all means write 

and that voice will be silenced."

-Steven McKinley Michael

How to write good...

Not every agent is the right one for you.

4 Ways to Make Readers Instantly Loathe Your Character Descriptions

recent years, a minimalist trend has surfaced regarding character descriptions. Common opinion these days states that physical descriptions are unnecessary, distracting, and even poor writing. “Dickens,” these minimalists claim, “might have been able to get away with a page and a half of in-depth description, but that sort of verbosity is not only intolerable in modern fiction but even retroactively ridiculous.” Having read far too many novelists who abuse and misuse the art of character descriptions, I’m in utter sympathy with whoever decided the character description was passé. But I’m not in agreement.

Most of the fuss over character descriptions is the result of two pitfalls:

1. Clichéd descriptions that add nothing to the characters, but rather render them as caricatures.

2. Inappropriate usage, placement, and emphasis.

Let’s address these one at a time.

1. Clichéd Character Descriptions

The only reason any description deserves to be included in a novel is because it adds something vital to the narrative. A romantic heroine with Barbie-blonde hair and a super-model figure doesn’t add much. Telling readers the bad guy in a western is squinty-eyed, dark-browed, and narrow-lipped does nothing to bring freshness to the story. (Of course, this is a problem that goes much deeper than simply description and probably finds its root in a clichéd character.)

But to take the other extreme and delete description entirely adds nothing either. You can’t put nothing into a story, and expect the reader to gain something.

As readers, we read in order to be told about people other than ourselves. Can our understanding of these people really be complete without some concept of their appearance—and thus how other people perceive them and how they perceive themselves?

2. Inappropriate Usage of Character Descriptions

Character descriptions need not be long; sometimes a single detail can anchor a character more firmly in the reader’s mind than a list of attributes two paragraphs long. Avoid “laundry lists” at all costs. Rattling off a character’s hair color, eye color, height, and weight isn’t going to bring the reader any closer to the character. Strive instead for “telling details” that highlight not only appearance but the character they represent.

As a child, I was fascinated with the phrase “Grecian nose” and felt quite the sophisticate whenever I managed to work it into my stories. Never mind the fact that I had no idea what a Grecian nose looked like. I’m still not sure what it looks like, but I do know it’s a nonstarter as a descriptive aid, not only because it is unrecognizable to most readers, but because it brings nothing to the characterization table.

3. Inappropriate Placement of Character Descriptions

I’ve heard the arguments that suggest readers don’t like authors to describe characters because it interferes with the reader’s preconceived image of the character. But I’m here to tell you that I want to know how the writer perceives the character. However, it’s important to make sure the description is dropped into the narrative early enough to shape the reader’s preconception. Don’t wait until Chapter 15 to tell the reader that the hero is cross-eyed and has red- and green-striped hair.

4. Inappropriate Emphasis on Character Descriptions

The amount of description we give any character needs to be in direct proportion to his importance in the story. Spending two paragraphs on a throwaway character will do nothing but misdirect—and probably frustrate—readers. Outline your minor characters with one or two modifiers, and save your most impressive descriptive powers for the protagonists.

Character descriptions are great fun to craft. When used correctly, they can’t help but hone the cutting edge of your story.

By: K.M. Weiland

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